Archive | February, 2012

That’s a RAP!

28 Feb

You know – after about every 10 messages on POF I discover a nice email that actually makes me smile (<– shocking, I know!!).

Hey wats up, i wrote u a little rap/poem because i too like to write and i enjoy being creative lol, hope you like it 🙂 here it goes….

I don’t know you and you don’t know me
But were both aware nights can get lonely,
Im not on this site tryin to find a wifey,
Im jus on here tryin to meet someone thats like me,
Down to earth and outgoing but laid back as well,
A humorous intellect who doesn’t mind Taco Bell,
I enjoy happy hour on the intercoastal,
Maybe I’l catch a flick if i dont wanna be social,
I hit the beach on the weekends day or night,
Maybe I’l take a few puffs to get the feeling right,
Got my guitar in hand always ready to rock,
Could be on stage at a bar or sittin on the dock,
Now you know a little bit about what I adore,
I’ve got an idea let’s not be strangers anymore,

Of course, my pessimistic side immediately wonders how many other times this boy has shared this clever little rap poem. 😀

Does it really matter? 

Naaaaa. I still enjoyed it. 🙂

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Angry Boys: Part Deux

28 Feb

Have I mentioned that there are a lot of angry boys on Plenty of Fish?

This angry little man sent me a short, ‘sweet,’ and simple message expressing exactly how he felt about me.

“U aint that fine ! Especially to be ignorin my sexy ass !!”
 
 
First of all – I never said I was fine. He came to that conclusion all on his own.
 
Secondly – I didn’t ignore him intentionally. For goodness sake – I haven’t had time to check all of the emails I’ve received in the last few days.
 
So far I’m finding that there are Plenty of BAD fish in the sea.
 

Single -n- Strange

27 Feb

I know I’m a tad bit weird (who doesn’t have a little weirdness in them?) but some people are certifiably strange.

Looking for Mr. Right or even Mr. Right Now is challenging and seemingly impossible.

But! Fear not! I think I’ve found myself an exotic man, my friends.  

Where’s that EASY button?

Here’s my Exotic-Man-O-Choice!

I pulled these tid bits purely for your entertainment.

I am 6’3 good looking from Israel love to know uuuu.

Profession: Self emploid (love that!)

Wanna know what he included in his “About Me” section? Interesting stuff right here.

i let u know xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

…On to the next…

Now, is he looking for a girlfriend? Or is he just seeking help.

hey, don’t know your name ,I have write you before.
I have a question, are you a good good writer? have write something on your owne?
I have a project but I am not a good writer. I can program or use ibooks author up and down.
what do you think? let me know.

Huh?

…And then…

You want real then you will thumb wrestle me over some texting… Name is —- Beautiful 5555555555 if your this awsome you will put up a good wrestle hehehehehehe

I’m actually at a loss of words. Or at least I was until I read his profession.

 Profession Pesent

…Last but not least strange…

About me? I’m just here to meet up with new people who enjoy life and want to smile because it’s the 2nd best thing you can do with your lips.What more is there to say?

Ay ya ya!!

!!Step away from the punctuation keys!!

27 Feb

Punctuation ……… it makes our sentences flow and it makes the writing more understandable. 🙂

Right? Right!

Some, though, get a little nuts-o with the exclamation and question marks. Why????????? I know people try to get the point across but after reading these messages I felt like taking a shot and a Xanax!!!!!!!!!!!  😐

Here goes!

Excited dude numero uno:

Yeah ok if thats for real you I will surrender hand over my ball and chain give you my short leash and grant you
every dream come true!!!!! NO BULL SHIT!!!! NO DRAMA!!!!!!! NO GAMES!!!!!!!! You for real then here your
Mountain Man Stands!!! No Lie at a drop of a hat im yours!!!!!! My momma didnt raise no fool…. Omg your so
freaking Fire!!!! Your Beautiful sense of humor real honest simple looking for me your Fairy Tale! Your Dream
Come True!!!! Your Prince Charming!!! Wow!!!! A Dream Come True!!! Im Real!!!!!! Here I am!!!! I am your Shrek!!!!

Someone get me a shot! Stat!

Excited dude numero dos:

Hi pretty!!!
How are you?
I like your profile!
Love your smile!!!
I don’t have that much friends!!!
can we be friends??
😉

<Xanax please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!>

Angry Boys

26 Feb

Not to be confused with the well known Angry Birds… 😀

These boys have a severe problem with rejection.

Angry Boy: What’s up I’m —– I just moved here from boston how are you (2/16/2012 9:54:58 PM)

Angry Boy: Guess u don’t like italians (2/17/2012 7:15:43 AM)

He didn’t give me much time to respond if you think about it. I was either sleeping or getting ready for work in between the times he messaged me. 😛

The truth: I do not discriminate against Italians.

Angry Boy 2: i’m a bit pessimistic, so before we continue, I need to know you don’t discriminate against guys that have a good job, are funny, and attractive…

I viewed his profile and then moved on to check other messages. No sooner did I exit his profile that I received his follow-up message:

Angry Boy 2:  a view of my profile and no hello? It’s all good jupiter girls are nothing but trouble!
 
The truth: I was actually thinking about responding to his message – but not after that. And I highly doubt that all women (or girls as he put it) in Jupiter, FL are trouble. That just can’t be. 🙂
 
I responded to Angry Boy 2 with the following – and then I blocked his a**.
 
Seriously? I wanted to go through all of my messages and remove who I wasnt interested in (btw – I kept your message because I actually enjoyed your profile). But, being that you are too impatient to wait for a reply and automatically assume I am not interested then there’s no need for us to communicate. Have a wonderful evening
 
Angry Boy 3 was downright rude. He emailed me with a short message (I didn’t keep this one) that included star plumgazer lily, if I remember correctly. It didn’t even make sense.
 
I made the awful (<– sarcasm) mistake of not responding right away. I had only viewed his profile.
 
The truth: He was to muscle-y for my taste. Can’t a girl have preferences?
 
Angry Boy 3 then emailed me “fuckface” to which I replied “What?” I mean, come on, I would never say that to anyone who didn’t reply to an email. I mean if the person isn’t interested then they’re not interested!!  These angry boys must believe that every single girl should be so lucky to have them.
 
Think again, angry boys.
 
He did email me back.
 
Angry Boy 3: I said it, you read it. now what do you have to say shithead?
 
*Sigh*  Do the world a favor, bub – seek help.
 
You know…they really should disable the whole ‘see who viewed my profile’ option. It just makes these boys hostile. :/ 

Chef (Take 2!)

26 Feb

 Being that the title is Chef (Take 2), you’re most likely pondering “What happened to take #1?”

That relationship is more of an ‘ouch’ than anything so I’d rather not share it.  Not right now at least. 🙂 Perhaps some other time.

So. I met a nice guy. Yes it can happen.

I met Larry through one of the dating sites. I think it was Match.com … or Zoosk. Who knows. They’re all the same.

This guy appeared to be promising … at first. He was cute. We got along great electronically and I began to look forward to his emails every day. A couple weeks after our initial emails we planned our first date.

We met at a very chill bar in Boynton Beach. It was right on the water. The evening was cold but it was still beautiful out.

Overall, the first date went well.  We spent four hours just enjoying some drinks and getting to know each other. I guess I was pretty happy with the turn out. Larry seemed to be a really great guy. Boy does that phrase sound like a cliché (<–is that the right word to use?). Inevitably a ‘but…’ will follow.

But …

  1. He wasn’t assertive and I had to begin a lot of the conversations. I like a man who can carry his own and I wasn’t getting that vibe from Larry. Now I know what you’re thinking. Give the man a chance, right? I deserve a good guy and there I was picking him apart right after the first date. *sigh* There’s no helping me.
  2. Sadly…There was no spark. Nothing. Not even a “well he’s got a great personality so I can make this work for sure.” I just wasnt attracted to him. Physical attraction is important for me – call me shallow if you will.

A week later was our second date. A dinner date this time at a very nice (insanely expensive) Italian restaurant in Delray Beach. Dinner was amazing. I never knew chicken could taste like that! Really. It was that fantastic. I had Pollo Portobello (chicken with Portobello in a champagne cream sauce – Yum-O) & a glass of nerve relaxing pinot noir. Have I ever mentioned my intense love for champagne?  Love me some bubbly.

Anywho –  I did a lot of the talking because he just kept looking at me.  Compliment taken and definitely appreciated but I was interested in knowing more about him so I simply continued to ask him question after question … and I was sure to keep the wine flowing.

Larry was really nice and probably the right kind of guy to be with but…I don’t know. Not only was I certain there was zero physical attraction but I was more concerned that he wasn’t intellectual enough to keep me interested. (Does that sound too insensitive?)

My friends kept telling me to give him another chance. Blah blah blah. I get it. Really. Girls are supposed to go with the put-together guy who’s nice and would treat ‘em great. But like I said – I did not feel anything for him. There was no chemistry. And how many dates should you go on to find out whether the ‘right’ feelings will manifest themselves into your mind & body? Riddle me this…

To sum up my feelings for Larry – I was more excited about the food than him.  That’s a pretty bad sign, huh? After that dinner date he walked me to my car. Right when he was about to kiss me I said “Have a good night!” and couldn’t get into my car fast enough. Poor guy looked confused. I should have wanted to kiss him but I wasnt feelin it one bit. Instead I ran away to the privacy and solace of my car. Crisis averted.

Moving on…I didn’t want to date him anymore but I was convinced otherwise by others. I’d try to give it another whirl.

I had told Larry that the next evening I’d be driving up to Orlando for the weekend to visit my family and my best friend. What really pushed me over the edge was that he text me at midnight the night I drove up there.

I didn’t bother replying to his message. I was perturbed by the fact that he would even think of texting me so late in the night. My best friend doesn’t even do that.

The next morning I was ranting and raving to my mom about it and how much it irked me. Of course my loving mom said, “It’s not a bad thing – it means he cares. He sounds like a really nice guy.”

There it is again. The nice guy deal. My mom was right, though. He did care. I knew he did. The problem was that I didn’t. Hence my anger. Instead of following my heart I placed too much emphasis on what other people thought I should do.

Sometimes you just have to trust how you feel – no matter what your friends say. Lesson learned.

What’s in a screen name? (POF style)

25 Feb

This will be a short post but I’ve just gotta ask – what’s in a screen name?

The screen name will represent you – it acts as a cover up, if you will. Without providing your real name you can create a mix of letters, symbols, & numbers that will stand for you. It doesnt have to make sense to anyone but you (and even then it can mean absolutely nothing).

Or! Creating a screen name is it juuuust another way to assert your perverted nature.

Let me just say, any guy that can integrate the word “cum” into their screen name – well, it just screams out “Winner!” How delightful!

Seriously I cant remember what the rest of his screen name was.

I was so turned off by this that I bypassed his message and profile and went directly to the “Block User” button. How gross. Maybe some girls like that? Even find it humurous? Not this gal. 😛

Ooo! Here’s another screen name fail. The word “Daddy.”

I can assure you that these gents are not including “Daddy” in their screen names because of their status as a single father.

Oh no.

They want to be called daddy. Hmm. Nope. Not happening. Not here. Not ever. YUCK!  I happen to love my father very much. Calling a guy I’m dating “Daddy” is just wrong on soooooooooooo many levels.

See?

When in doubt some resort to acronyms. Here’s a goodie: OMGLOL

Some dudes just lack creativity overall. Here’s a nice one. “yeaaaaaaaaaa”

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. 🙂 Thanks for stopping by!