Love, Science, and Online Dating

3 Jun

Yes I purchased this book. For $20. I know. But I can explain…

I was sitting in an airport getting ready to head home. My mind was agonized by … well, emotional crap. I’m a girl. Being emotional comes naturally to me.

While I racked my brain for reasons why men do the things they do I came across this book. It appeared to offer the explanations and reasons I needed at that particular moment.

So that’s when I busted out the $20 for Jena Pincott’s “Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes? Bodies, Behavior, and Brains-The Science Behind Sex, Love, & Attraction.” The title does a great job of explaining the book’s purpose.

Anywho, being that I’m exploring the online dating world and all of its glory, I found a section in Chapter 8 to be interesting. The section on page 239 is titled “What secret biases do data from online dating sites reveal?” 

Here are some interesting snippets. You’ve gotta love the studies that are done by economists, professors, and scientists alike.

“Unsurprisingly, one of the big prejudices that surfaced concerns attractiveness.”   Obviously – you’re pretty much window shopping for a mate…

“Judging by the number of first-contact emails, men love long straight hair.” Oh that’s me! That’s me!

Continuing off of that last statement – “They prefer your hair color most if you’re blond-” Cant say I’m surprised there…

Here’s a goodie: “Men also prefer women who are light for their height. If you had a body mass index (BMI) of 16-18, the weight-to-height ratio of an anorexic (approximately 100-112 pounds at five feet six), you’d have 90 percent more first-contact emails than a woman with a BMI of 24, which is at the high end of the normal range.” Does anyone find that disturbing? Or am I just reading it wrong. So I’m supposed to become anorexic with long blond hair to attract a man?

“Meanwhile, women homed in on the part of men’s profiles that specify their income.” Okay – I don’t do that. Honestly. Finding a normal man would be a fantastic start.

This one deserves a small “LOL”: “FYI, men also lie about their height; 53 percent stretch the truth a half inch or more in their profiles.”

The most amazing part (I say that with sarcasm)? When race is related to salary. It’s actually quite ridiculous no matter the level of truth to it. Here’s just one example:

  • For white women, a black man would need to earn $154,000 more each year to be considered equally desirable as a white guy with an average income of $62,500, Hispanic men an additional $77,000, and Asian men an additional $247,000.”

“Meanwhile, men are basically indifferent about women’s income or profession, as long as a woman’s success doesn’t intimidate them.” Boys, boys, boys…

“Men turn up their noses at older women, and older women turn up their noses at younger men.” Ha!! 🙂


12 Responses to “Love, Science, and Online Dating”

  1. susielindau June 3, 2012 at 11:00 am #

    Women don’t judge men by their looks as much. Look around at all the beautiful women with not so perfect looking mates. The men however can be dogs when picking out a mate!
    Personally, I got attention when I was a blonde and when my hair was dark brunette. Not so much as light brown…. I felt my almost black hair was just as dramatic…so there you go!

    • ConnieMaria June 3, 2012 at 11:15 am #

      Lol Hmmm. It might just be time to dye my hair!! 😉

  2. amschultzwriter June 3, 2012 at 11:00 pm #

    Fun post. It’s fascinating how data compilation reveals the dirty secrets about human nature that we often (poorly) try to disguise and recondition for generations. The book sounds like it could be well worth the $20 read.


    • ConnieMaria June 4, 2012 at 6:16 pm #

      Hi A.M. 🙂 Thanks for the comment. You make a good point. I guess I just immediately feel it’s ridiculous content because I just dont want to believe that people are actually like that. *sigh* 😀

  3. 4amWriter June 4, 2012 at 9:45 pm #

    I’d say for $20 that was a pretty good purchase, at the least it sounds entertaining! I’m ashamed about the earnings expectation held by women and how it relates to race. I’m gonna have to really think about that one..

    Thanks for sharing!

    • ConnieMaria June 6, 2012 at 9:20 am #

      Hi there 🙂 Yes it is definitely entertaining lol. I felt a tad bit ashamed as well but at the same time I think “Ah this cannot be right” but what if it is….I mean they did the studies… I dont know what to think. 😛 Thank you for stopping by 😉

  4. amschultzcom June 4, 2012 at 10:17 pm #


    While people *may* be like that, I think a lot of the problem comes more from the expectations of what we *should* be like. Do men really want 105lb blondes, or is their desire for the “standard” more a reflection on their perceived societal gains if they were to date a woman who fits the “prize” mold? What combination of other qualities and personal/professional successes are needed to offset the basic, surface-level vales of physical attractiveness?

    This really is a great topic that could (and already has) make for some phenomenal case studies.


    • ConnieMaria June 6, 2012 at 9:21 am #

      You make very good points!!! I agree – great topic. Interesting, although the truth scares me at times… 🙂

  5. Yatin June 6, 2012 at 3:05 pm #

    Not sure a about 16-18 BMI, because that takes away all the curves. Can’t imagine 5’6″/105lb can don the desired curves most men go for 🙂 When I married her she was size 0 and bmi <18. and still that wasn't the criteria for me at all. We clicked on education (higher of course). Does this book talk on preference for professionals? Seems interesting read though 🙂

    • ConnieMaria June 15, 2012 at 9:54 am #

      Hi Yatin – I believe it does discuss the relation between dating and professions. Interesting read for sure – but the so-called ‘facts’ still frustrate me. 😀 Thanks for stopping by!

  6. The Hook July 3, 2013 at 9:12 am #

    Fascinating share!

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